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<title>Summer Blow Out Sale by Winnychan, xkingofgamesx</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25598263">Summer Blow Out Sale</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winnychan/pseuds/Winnychan'>Winnychan</a>, <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/xkingofgamesx/pseuds/xkingofgamesx'>xkingofgamesx</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Domestic Bliss, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 06:02:48</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>571</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25598263</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winnychan/pseuds/Winnychan, https://archiveofourown.org/users/xkingofgamesx/pseuds/xkingofgamesx</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Just some adorable Raph and Don arguing like an old married couple. A short illustrated TMNT fanfiction.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Donatello/Raphael (TMNT)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>28</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Summer Blow Out Sale</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>What is Donatello’s latest great invention? "Domestic Interaction" punch cards. With this, he explains, he can earn maybe an hour or so of Raph’s time for shit like decorating or shopping on Amazon together, in exchange for, oh, I don’t know. Insert number of blow jobs. Whatever Raph wants!</p><p>Raph requires several explanations before it really sinks in that, yes, Don is serious about this. Then he launches into protests that he never had to decorate shit <em> before </em> to get blowjobs. “How does anybody take an hour to pick out house decorations, anyway? Do I really gotta spend a whole hour pretending to want this thing or that thing? WHAT FOR?”</p><p>Don gives him a very stubborn look and says nothing.</p><p>MUCH LATER. </p><p>They are in front of a computer. Tension has risen. Big time.</p><p>“I NEED IT TO BE PERFECT, RAPHAEL. DO YOU LIKE THE DAMASK OR DO YOU NOT LIKE THE DAMASK??"</p><p>"I FUCKIN' HATE IT! I hate all of these so much! You know which one we should'a got? The very first one we looked at, like FORTY FUCKING MINUTES AGO!”</p><p>"THE CHIFFON?? ARE YOU INSANE!?"<br/>
<br/>
“MAYBE?! I DUNNO IF IT'S YOU OR ME GOIN’ CRAZY RIGHT NOW. IT'S LIKE YER SPEAKING SOME ALIEN LANGUAGE.”</p><p>"IT'S CALLED FASHION, KAREN. LOOK IT UP."</p><p>“NEVER! NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS WILL I LEARN TO TALK ABOUT THIS SHIT!”</p><p>"I JUST WANT YOU TO CHOOSE SOME NICE FUCKING DRAAAAAAPES." Don shakes him.</p><p>“I'M PUTTING UP FUCKING MINI BLINDS. PROBLEM SOLVED!”</p><p>"MINI BLINDS!? RAPH. BE REASONABLE!"</p><p>"Reasonable?! WE LIVE IN THE SEWER, DON! THERE ARE NO WINDOWS DOWN HERE! NOT A GODDAMN ONE!"<br/>
<br/>
"I JUST WANT THE WALL TO BE PRETTY, RAPH. WE NEED AN ACCENT TO TIE IN THE RUUUUUG."</p><p>"Throw that rug in the garbage! PROBLEM SOLVED!"</p><p>"That. Rug. Is. Beautiful. Don't you dare!” Don begins beating lightly on the other turtle’s plastron. "DAMASK OR JACQUARD, RAPH. DAMASK OR JACQUARD!?!"</p><p>"The Star Trek guy?” Raph looks horrified. “How is THAT supposed to match your stupid rug? Wait. Did you buy a <em> Star Trek rug </em>? Fuck that, Don. I’m puttin’ my foot down!"</p><p>".... no. No, baby. Not Jean Luc Picard. Jacquard. It is this design with these pretty floral bits. Remember, it was on page 12, babe."</p><p>Raph is groaning and clawing at his eyes. “Oh, right.  Page twelve! How the FUCK could I forget about the flowery shit on page twelve?"</p><p>"Let's start over and look at them all again."</p><p>"What? NO. I will put my FIST through that back button if you click that shit. I swear ta God!"</p><p>"BUT BABE. Listen to my logic on this one..." He clicks the button. "I like this pattern, but it is dry clean only, which is such a pain. And this one is more durable but the shade is a little off, and..."</p><p>Raph is starting to feel desperate. "THE BLACK ONE! There was a black one a couple pages ago! Can we have that one? Please? It's everything I ever wanted inna... inna whatever the fuck we're buying right now."</p><p>Don gives him a look and deadpans, "Drapes, Raphie. We are buying drapes."</p><p>"Yeah. That's..." Raph has to grit his teeth to spit the words out. "That's the thing I always wanted. Black ones. Totally."</p><p>"Okay." Don calmly adds it to the cart.<br/>
<br/>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
"Sooo. If you <em> had </em> to choose between these throw blankets-"</p><p>Raphael immediately explodes, "OH, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!"</p>
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